My wife has a very low sex drive and does not need or want sex. She refuses to give oral, claiming it causes lockjaw and is painful for her. So the only time we have sex is when she can’t put me off any longer and feels sorry for me, on average every 6 weeks or so.
The sex itself, to be honest, sucks. I won’t bore you with details, but it seems like she wants to make sure it’s as unpleasant for me as it apparently is for her.
I’m to the point where I hate to even ask. I’d rather take care of myself…
So I’ve often wondered, why won’t she just give me a hall pass?
Two things I must share about myself. First, I’m not a cheater. I’ve been ruthlessly faithful, even when sorely tempted by willing, attractive, available women in places my wife couldn’t possibly find out about.
Second, I identify as poly, and dabbled with multiple simultaneous relationships, as well as BDSM and swinging, too, with prior girlfriends. I told my wife all about this stuff before we married, because I didn’t want any secrets. She seemed intrigued, even turned on, by my “dark side.”
We went to some kinky parties and a swing club once (I watched her dance with and kiss a girl!), and talked about the possibility of having an open marriage. Ever the pragmatist, she said she was open to the possibilities, but if we had kids, she wouldn’t want to put them at risk. Whatever that means…
Naturally, we had kids shortly thereafter. All talk of anything out of the ordinary came to a screeching halt.
So here I am 11 years later, not getting my needs met.
I mean, she doesn’t want sex at all, but I want it as much as possible, up to 3 to 4 times a week.
Almost everything else about our marriage is tolerable, and if we worked at it, fixable. But I can’t for the life of me figure out a better solution for our sex life.
I’ve done it before, so I know I could handle a secondary, simultaneous relationship. It wouldn’t be “an affair” if everyone know what the deal was. (I wouldn’t want to do it unless everyone was on board.)
Sigh… I mean, really, what’s the big hangup!?
“If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, it’s yours. If it doesn’t, it never was.” I swear I would come back every night. I would love my wife SO MUCH MORE if she would just give me a little freedom!
If she asked me for this, I would grant it in a heartbeat! I would say, “PLEASE go fuck that guy’s brains out! Have a ball! Just be home by 11.”
I’d love to know what you and your readers’ opinions are on my situation.
Continue Reading Q&A – My Wife Hates Sex, Why Won’t She Just Give Me A Hall Pass?
When I was four-years-old, a classmate and I got in front in front of our kindergarten class and sang a song for everyone. I wish I can tell you it was “Billie Jean” and that it ended a moonwalk. I wish I can tell you that we brought puppets and put on a cute little show. And I really wish I had brought in a photo album with pictures of me as a flower girl at my uncle’s wedding. But that would not be very exciting. We rehearsed for hours in my tiny room in my tiny apartment a neat little number about boyfriends. One hand on our hips while the other raised an index finger to the audience as we sang in unison: “And I’m gonna find me a boyfriend…a boyfriend…a boyfriend. And I’m gonna find me a boyfriend…today!” We thought we were hot shit, she and I. The next day, my teacher, who was friends with my mom, had an impromptu parent-teacher conference in our kitchen. “Come on, V…sing the song again!”
We have decided to add erotic photography of us to our blog, formally known as Snapshot Wednesdays, now known as Sexy Snapshot. These won’t be low quality candids or shots taken from our cell phones, these will be photographs we love from our own little photo shoots. Hopefully these pictures will come out more like tasteful erotic art rather than amateur pornography. We will update the gallery each week with a new photo to share with our blog followers.
This week we have named our photo set “Lazy Afternoon.” Unlike previous Sexy Snapshots, we have added more than one photo of the shoot. These photos were taken with a Nikon D5200 in a low light setting. Venice and I were laying on the couch nude and she started teasing me by licking on my shaft and balls. I went from erect, to flaccid, to erect, to flaccid again, before I let her know I wanted to grab the camera. I noticed that my dick was frothing each time I would get flaccid and I thought it would be a good moment to capture. Along with the dripping shots, I also caught some good shots of Venice’s breasts in the low light setting, as well as he sucking on my penis erect.
Below is a great list of sex education links to various websites. We have decided to share them with our readers thinking maybe one of these will be useful. If not, maybe your child accidentally seeing your history will lead him to this link, instead of to all the smut and porn sites you browse daily. 🙂