Random Moments – The Orgasm Drive-By

3904335177_e1010679e2_zAfter work yesterday, Ryan and I went to the mall to look for a birthday present for his sister. “I think she needs a new wallet,” I told him. So we entered through Sears because it was the quickest way to get to Old Navy.

As we were walking through the ladies section, stopping and glancing at different outfits, Ryan says,”I’m so hungry.”  His face looked weary because he skipped lunch that day.

“Me too,” I replied.

He shuffled his feet, exaggerating his hunger even more. “I want Chinese food,” he suddenly said as we passed by the ladies shoes.”

“Yea! That sounds good!” I said. We hadn’t eaten Chinese food in a few weeks and it sounded like a good idea.

“Mmm…I’d really like Mongolian Chicken…onions steaming hot and soft, dripping with sauce…and Sesame Chicken…Oh, god!! Thinking about it makes me want to orgasm!” As he said the word “orgasm” we passed by a lady hidden behind the lingerie panties and lingerie section. She gave Ryan a shocked look like, “I knew I shouldn’t have worn my yoga pants today.”

I looked at Ryan, laughed and said, “She gave you that, quit looking at my nipples glare!”

“Oh yea, she’ll have a story for her husband tonight.”  Ryan continued, “Oh Em Geeeee George, this guy was peering at my from behind the panty rack just watching me hold these brown silk bras up to my bosoms.  I can tell he was like a savage animal ready to pounce on me before he yelled out to everyone that he was orgasming to me. I feel so violated, sugar muffins!”  Orgasm Drive-By Orgasm Drive-By Orgasm Drive-By