The Five-Second Kiss Rule #AdultSexEdMonth

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It seems that the longer a couple has been together, the more difficult it becomes to be affectionate with each other. Complacency, habit, and just plain being “used to each other” can get in the way of the need to remind the other about their commitments. The time they set aside for one another can easily become routine or mundane if they’re not consistent, so every couple should create their own ways of ensuring their love still burns in them, even if it only flickers.

Ryan and I are of the opinion that a happy couple should have sex every day of their lives, and both partners should remind themselves in their own heads, why they love their partner. A good relationship is hard work. If it seems easy, more than likely you are missing something. With everything you do well, whether it be your health, your hobbies, and even your job, the more you do certain tasks, the better you get. For instance, the more you go to the gym and exercise, the stronger and healthier you look. It’s hard work being fit and healthy. Well, a healthy relationship is the same. Finding time to be intimate, make love, and make your partner feel special should be a daily activity. Yes, even kissing.

Don’t misunderstand me though, I do not mean have sex just to have sex, or kiss just to kiss. A couple must practice intimacy and positive thinking. It’s not just a cliche message to think positive, it’s the reality of a strong relationship. If you kiss, hug, or make love to your spouse, as much as you moan or purr in your partners arms, you must purr to yourself as well. Make it a mental exercise to tell yourself how lucky you are to have your partner. If you show enthusiasm, show enthusiasm because it makes it exciting and fun for you, not just for your other half. Fake intimacy or sex done out of obligation is worse than no sex at all, for both of you — resentment resentment. A man or woman should look into their own minds and figure out why it’s important to not only have sex, but to love the sex each time you are with your partner. Enthusiasm, wanting each other, loving each others’ touch, and feeling each others’ bodies rub and create the friction we read about in romance novels.

The above is a good example of why couples need to abide by the five-second kiss rule. Not just with your lips touching, but with your hands touching each others faces, cheek smelling, and yes, a little tongue, at least once a day. This may sound like a silly robotic act, but a routine isn’t always bad thing. It’s a bad routine if you are ignoring your partner’s needs each day, and it quickly turns into a lifestyle. The opposite is also true. It’s a good routine if you are purposely being intimate with your spouse each day, it too will eventually become your lifestyle. If you prepare yourself for any major event in your life, whether it be a test, fight, sports match, or a marathon, usually you will plan a routine and follow rules to reach your maximum potential prior to the event. In this case, it’s the most important event of your life, your happily ever after. For us, there is nothing more accepting than kissing each other and holding our mouths together to see how the other responds. Ryan has told me that since we’ve been together, that if he has ever even slightly opened his lips while kissing, I’ve always let my tongue slide inside his mouth. Not aggressively or quick, but just the tip of my tongue to feel for his tongue. It is something I never really noticed, but it’s almost like an antennae. It’s instinct for me to reach out with one of the most sensitive organs in my body and feel to see if he is receptive. As interesting as that idea is, that also makes oral sex extremely intimate when put into this perspective (I love nothing more than feeling the tastes, shapes, and textures of my man’s penis and balls on my tongue – his most private possessions).  Ryan also noticed that I will wait for him to open his mouth before I initiate tongue play. It’s a team game, and you both do things you may not even notice, but if the love is present, it works. Of course, if we weren’t in love, we wouldn’t want to even kiss, let alone open our mouths and have the other stick their tongue in.

We don’t do this just for the pleasure of kissing, or even the possibility of sex to follow, it’s for the attachment we feel each day to the person we decided to spend the rest of our lives with. Our mouths are the dirtiest parts of our body, and although kissing is done in public and isn’t seen as a “dirty act“, the truth is, sticking your wet organ/tongue in another person’s wet body/mouth, swapping saliva and juices, and feeling each other’s lips is just as intimate as sex itself. Sex is taboo and private, which created a stigma with the act. Everyone wants to do what we can’t do, so sex became this important mountain in our relationships. In fact, some couples have built sex up so much that they (or their religion expects them to) wait until after marriage to enjoy each other sexually. However, kissing (being so close you almost breath the same air — as if you could save each other’s life with a sexual CPR) was acceptable. I’m not downplaying the importance of sex, but I am making a good argument for kissing being much more intimate and important than people think.  Under appreciated and neglected in aging relationships.  A physical connection and intimacy keeps your chemicals and hormones flowing, and if you follow your own guidelines to try your hardest to truly enjoy this physical time, you both will love each other more. No resentment for a man “wanting it too much” and no resentment from a woman “never giving me sex anymore.”

Kiss for 5 seconds everyday, or every time you say goodbye, or before you go to bed.  You won’t regret it.

Review: 1 Night In China (Chyna & X-Pac) WWE Sex Tape

1 night in china

1 Night in China is a pornographic movie featuring professional wrestling personalities Sean Waltman and Joanie Laurer, which was released by Red Light District Video in 2004. While Waltman and Laurer were engaged at the time they filmed 1 Night in China, they broke up before it was released. Laurer has made several pornographic films since, beginning with Another Night in China in 2009, which is considered to be a sequel to 1 Night in China.

 For those of you who are not familiar with Chyna or X-Pac, they were both WWE wrestlers in the early 2000s.  Chyna was known to have a huge muscular body, while X-Pac was the only guy in the WWE that wasn’t huge and muscular.  In fact, X-Pac used to go by the name 1 2 3 Kid, because he was a small wrestler who was known for his flying arsenal rather than power moves.  Like a real freak show match up, this 1 Night in China (Chyna) is like a female Andre The Giant vs Jake “The Snake” Roberts.

Continue Reading Review: 1 Night In China (Chyna & X-Pac) WWE Sex Tape

Celebrity Sex Tape Reviews: 1 Night In Paris (Paris Hilton)

Parisdvd21 Night in Paris is a 2004 pornographic video depicting Paris Hilton having sexual intercourse in 2001 with Rick Salomon. Not originally intended for release, it was filmed primarily with a single, stationary, tripod-mounted camera using “night vision.” However, a handful of scenes were filmed indoors without night vision.

Continue Reading Celebrity Sex Tape Reviews: 1 Night In Paris (Paris Hilton)

Celebrity Sex Tape: Our Thoughts and Reviews

untitled2Two things that pique our most primal instincts: watching people fuck or fight.  Let’s cut to the chase – people enjoy celebrity sex tapes because they are watching celebrities fuck.   It’s a small window of opportunity to look inside the lives of famous people and see how they do the dirty deed.  Most of the time, our minds build these people up into super humans; famous and able to do things we can only imagine.  However, seeing them fuck brings them right back down to earth.  We love that. Money and fame can’t make a celebrity’s sex life any better than Mary Joe and Billy Bob in the trailer park.  Money didn’t make his dick big, didn’t make his female partner fly around the bed room and land on his cock after 8 flips and a somersault, and it didn’t make his orgasm any different from our own.  Good sex is all about attitude, keeping your ego in check, and letting someone totally consume you (something celebrities have a very hard time with), and being open and comfortable with your partner.

If you’ve watched a sex tape, ask yourself why.  Did you wonder what a person who has money and fame fucks like?   Oh, Ms. Everything is so gorgeous and a great actor, I wonder how well she fucks and sucks dick?  I wonder how she grooms her vagina?   How do her nipples look?  I wonder if her partner is huge?   How big is his dick?  In fact, these questions will be our official categories when rating videos.

Below I have listed each category with a short description of the criteria for each:

Categories:

Quality:  Can you even see what is going on?  Most real sex tapes do not have the best quality (see our stuff), so we will rate each videos quality.  This opinion will be based solely of the quality of the footage, not the content.

Entertainment Value:   Is the video even worth the attention it gets?  Does this sex tape include real home video footage, paid actors with fake “home” footage, wrestling midget clowns, corny dialogue, or just straight sex footage.   This category speaks for itself.  Entertainment value.

Star Factor:  Can this video turn a C-rated celebrity into a superstar?   Does the video live up to the hype behind the name?  We’ll decide.

Skill: Does he/she fuck good?  Of course this is all based on our opinions, but we will judge the skill level of these celebs.  Does he fuck good, does she suck dick amazing, or do they just flat out stink in the sack?

The Woman:  This category will be based off the quality of the woman/women, including her hair, her breasts, her ass, her vagina grooming habits, and yes, probably even her nails.

The Man: Everyone likes to see what a man is working with, including other men.   In other words, is his dick big?   If the man is a celeb or not, we will let you know our opinions of what sized tools are being used in each sex tape.

Sexual Value:  This is a bit different from entertainment value, simply because I can be entertained, but not wet.  During the videos, Ryan and I will sit next to each other and I will fondle him, rub his balls, and watch with an open mind.  I assume he will be doing the same.   Does it give Ryan an erection?     Does it make me want to suck his dick?  We will watch the videos together and if we fuck during or immediately after, the videos will be given a high sex value.    I assume, famous or not, if the sex is good and they both seem into it, it will turn us both on.   If the sex is medicore, we will let you know.

Our Format:
Quality:
Entertainment Value:
Star Factor:
Skill Level:
The Woman:
The Man:
Sexual Value:
Summary and Conclusion:

In all fairness, we have certainly had our own stuff criticized, reviewed, hated, loved, insulted, complimented, judged, and so on. With over a half million views on our “sex tapes,”,we understand that nothing can please everyone.  Some people think a dick is big, some people think a dick is small.  Some people think a woman acting timid and sucking dick slow is amazing, some people think that is lame as hell.  Opinions are just that, opinions.  Our reviews are meant to entertain those that come to our site and read our blogs, moreso than truly judge a sex tape.  If you were really interested in a sex tape, I assume you’d find it yourself rather than come here to read our opinions about it.