Rants and Frustrations – Debit and Credit Card Drama

frustrationSo I walk into a local Mom & Pop store hoping to buy a few drinks for the work week. Unfortunately the drinks I usually buy were expired so instead of leaving empty handed I grab a few smaller drinks and head up to the counter.

As the cashier rings it up I pull out my debit card, which for the last 10 years I’ve never had a problem with. The cashier, who was eyeballing me check the dates on the drinks I put back, looks at me with a frown and says, “Sorry, we have a $5 dollar minimum limit on using debit cards.” As I step back to gather my thoughts I also notice a sign that says, “For our employees safety, no bills over 20 please.” Another sign says, “Sorry, no personal checks and no American Express.”

What the fuck.

Annoyed, I reply, “Okay, I guess I will take some gum and maybe a $.25 cent super sized lemon head? How much is that?”

The cashier responds with, “That’s $4.20, do you want something else?”

At this point I am ready to walk out of the store. I am not the type to get annoyed, frustrated easy, or write rants like this, but for whatever reason, this situation absolutely pisses me off. I respond with a blank face, “Can you just ring up $.80 cents worth of invisible product?”

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Subway Offers the New 3 inch Delux?

subwayThe new Subway 3 inch delux?  If  you are going to do a comparison photo, and your penis can barely cover an inch of bread, please do not use a foot long Subway.  Word of advice for Ian Jett, next time please use a tater tot for your comparison. 

An employee at a Subway fast food chain in Columbus, Ohio, posted a picture of himself resting his penis on the restaurant’s sandwich bread to Instagram.

“My name is @ianjett and I will be your sandwich artist today,” read a caption that accompanied the not-suitable-for-work picture that appeared on Ian Jett’s feed.

When confronted about the picture, Jett tried to clarify his reason for sharing the image of his little penis over the foot-long bread roll.

“I would never do that at work — it was at home,” Jett told the Huffington Post. “This isn’t something I’d ever do at Subway. It was totally a joke.” — we do agree with this statement, his  penis is definitely a joke.

As if seeing a man’s micro penis resting atop the restaurant’s sandwich bread isn’t enough Continue Reading Subway Offers the New 3 inch Delux?

Brooklyn’s Smallest Penis Contest Winner, Says He’s Proud Of Victory

smallestpenisIt must takes big balls to be proud of having the smallest penis.  In that case, Nick Gilronan  must have testicles the size of watermelons.  Please see the photo.  Okay, wait, he doesn’t.  

The 27-year-old UPS Store worker who won Brooklyn’s smallest penis contest said he’s proud of his tiny package. 

Ladies, he always delivers.

“The size of a man’s penis does not matter for who he is as a person or in a relationship. Same thing with breast size. We’re all made in different shapes and sizes, but the media puts pressure on people to look a certain way,” he told the website Gothamist  after his victory Saturday at Kings County Bar.  Gilronan then said he wanted to “put on a good show for the audience. Looks like my efforts were successful.”

Continue Reading Brooklyn’s Smallest Penis Contest Winner, Says He’s Proud Of Victory

Jerkin’ Jersey Joe’s Pizzeria and His Special Pizza Sauce

jerkingjoeSAN DIEGO — A real jerk job.

The owner of Jersey Joe’s Pizzeria told Huffington Post today that he’s not the guy in a photo circulating around the Internet, showing a white-haired man masturbating in a pizzeria kitchen — nor is it anyone working at his establishment.

In Jersey Joe’s storefront window, the humble eatery proudly displays an “A” rating from San Diego’s Department of Environmental Health, with a score of 98 on its recent June 3 inspection.

Reporters at the shop showed Giusepp “Jersey Joe” Scire the photo, which was posted on the photo-sharing website 4Chan, and then Yelp.

“It is not me [in the photo] and that’s not my pizzeria,” Scire told the Huffington Post.

Continue Reading Jerkin’ Jersey Joe’s Pizzeria and His Special Pizza Sauce

Japan Busts BBW Escort Service – Dirty Panty Vending Machines Still Allowed

bbwjapanSome Japanese places  are okay with Sumo wrestlers in thongs, dirty panties in vending machines, hand jobs at massage parlors, and sex anime, but BBW is just too much, and too western. 

Japanese police have arrested the alleged ringleader of a sex home-delivery service specialising in women weighing up to 150 kilograms (330 lbs), a spokesman said.

Keiko Saito, 41, and one of her employees are suspected of conspiring to run a prostitution business under the name “Makkusu Bodi” (Max Body), which boasted that it catered for men who like “explosive boobs and bums”, police said.

Saito is alleged to have had about 30 overweight women working for her, including one who tipped the scales at more than 150 kilograms, Jiji Press reported.

Police say punters in Tokyo could telephone to request a visit in their home or hotel room, a service called “deri-heru” (delivery health) that is widespread in Japan, where it is illegal to sell penetrative sex.

Saito, who is believed to have earned about 400 million yen ($4 million) over three years, had previously worked as a prostitute, Jiji said. She began her business because she believed larger women were popular with customers, the agency added.

Vegas, you know what you have to do to fill this void.  Get the BBW’s lined up.  The Japanese men don’t come to Vegas just to gamble, that’s for sure.

Source:  Fox News