V, I am newly married and found your blog a few months ago. I love your experiences, even though I don’t think I could ever have a threesome. That has nothing to do with my question though. I am 19 and pregnant. Ever since I got pregnant my husband refuses to cum in me. I’ve asked him in every way I could think of and he says, ‘I already put one in the oven.” I am sure that’s just his excuse, because the alternative to him cumming in me is pulling out and cumming on my face. I am trying not to take it personal, but I just feel so disrespected when he does this to me. I mean, maybe a few times a month or something, but not every night. I feel like he is trying to live out his porn star fantasies and I am his real doll. Am I wrong for feeling disrespected and is there any way to take a facial and feel good about yourself?
Sorry V, one more question. How can I explain to him why I want his cum in my vagina? I’ve tried to say because it just feels right or I just want your cum in me, and he doesn’t get it. He thinks because I am pregnant there is no need to cum in me anymore. Can you help me explain to him why a woman wants her man’s cum in her body? I just know I want it, but don’t know why. Thanks, sorry about my preggie hormones, lol.
Thank you for taking the time to read. We appreciate those who stop by our blog and read our stories. Whether or not people agree, our goal is to provide insight as to how one couple has taken a big step in their relationship. Although our readers may have differing opinions from us, one thing we do adamantly emphasize across the board to everyone, is open communication. Which is usually the answer to every question we get.
In your situation, you’re unsure if your husband is trying to live out his porn star fantasies and you feel like his sex doll. This makes you feel disrespected. I understand where your feelings come from, but feel you have more growing to do. What you and your husband do in the privacy of your bedroom should never make you feel like you’re being disrespected. So he wants to shoot his load all over your face? Why not beat him to the punch and beg for it? Embrace his body and his cum and make it your thing. You’re married and sex is no longer this taboo enigma that has rules. The bedroom is now your sexual war zone and there are no rules of engagement.
Forget everything you thought the first time you heard about icky sex when you were 9 years old, forget everything you’ve ever heard about sex being wrong, dirty, or naughty, forget about your preacher, your parents, your friends, your family, and your sex education teacher. Sex with your spouse should be absolutely uninhibited. You’ve passed every criteria for what made sex wrong, no longer wrong; therefore, no matter how used or disrespected feel, your bed room should be an absolute no holds barred. And that’s how it should be! Don’t let the remnants of your old immature thought process effect your adult relationship. Give him the thrill and excitement that he fantasizes about and sees. How did you learn to socialize? How did you learn to read body language? How did you learn to walk? How did you learn to cook? Everything we do as humans we learn from observation. This is how we learn. As kids, or yes, even adults, we observe adult movies. Unfortunately growing up, you cannot observe sex so there is no way to really learn what is okay and what isn’t. All we know is that sex is bad and if you do it you are wrong. As adults we get the opportunity to actually see sex, and yes, we judge movies, novels, and Cosmo magazines for what we view as romantic, and porn movies for what we view as sexual. It’s not bad or dirty, it’s the only real outlet to observe sex. And like with everything we do as humans, we want to observe, do what we see, and mock the the different techniques that excite us because the visuals turn us on. So with all that said, do everything in your power to be his own personal porn star. Don’t waste your time worrying about what is or isn’t disrespectful, because he married and dedicated his life to you. You see the porn he watches as disrespectful, he sees it as a how good sex should be. He can’t disrespect you. It’s role play. You should find what he likes to watch and do what they do just to surprise him. He’ll love you even more for being thoughtful to his needs.
Does that mean all porn sex is good sex? I do not think so. For one, they get paid to do what they do, so they overact. It’s fake. And to be honest, I do think professional porn has a disrespectful element to it. I also think that is why some people like to watch it. I personally think women getting cum all over their face for money is prostitution, but…it still gets me wet. And yes, I believe when the porn star men cum all over these women their intentions are to disrespect them and mark their territory (which isn’t theirs). However, that’s something you or I will never have to worry about. We don’t do it for money. As much as we observe porn to learn the different techniques, porn will never be sincere with it’s relationships. It’s purely acting. Porn will never be about love or girls loving sex. It will always be about money and what men and women will do for money. That doesn’t mean getting cum on your face is disrespectful, because unlike porn stars, your husband married you. He is your territory, and you are his. If he wants to mark his territory, let him. He deserves it. And good sex isn’t about porn star sex, it’s about communication and you both talking to each other sharing your fantasies and desires. As a woman, you should feel disrespected if he had those fantasies but was too scared to be open with you to share them. To me, that is disrespectful. I want to know everything about my husband, and if he has a spark of desire to squirt his semen all over my face, then I have that spark of desire to give him that moment. And trust me, if your attitude is positive, understanding that the cum all over your face doesn’t make you look silly, it’s makes you sexy as fuck. Losing that innocent girl mentality is the key to an extremely satisfying sex life. I love seeing it shoot out, I love feeling the warmth on my face, and the excitement on my husband’s face when he releases. It is such a turn on to me. If he decides to pull out, I beg for him to shoot on my face, pussy, ass, tits – wherever we feel like having his cum that day.
I’m not a marriage counselor or psychologist/psychiatrist, but your husband telling you that he won’t cum in you because he already “put on in the oven” may not have anything to do with you already being pregnant. He may just be afraid of semen touching the baby (don’t laugh, I’ve read about this before) or simply, he may just see you as the mother of his unborn child. Or maybe he just wants to be kinky and he is using that as nothing more than excuse. He shouldn’t need an excuse. Let him cum where he wants. Quit playing ego tug-of-war and embrace your sex life.
It takes work to keep a marriage exciting. Marriage is a living, breathing entity that needs constant nurturing and attention. If there’s a sudden change in his behavior or desires, take note.
Lastly, you asked how you could explain to him why you want his cum in your vagina. To me, I see a definite correlation between ejaculation into the vagina as a permanent connection between a man and woman. I see it as ownership of each other. He has planted his seed in you. He has trusted you with his DNA, seeds, and possible children. Although you may never have children, the idea behind the ejaculation is instinct and remains the same. Especially when allowing a man to cum inside your vagina. The passing of semen represents the idea of being in each other’s lives forever. You carry his seeds, his child. Your body pleases him so much that it causes his body to lose control and ejaculate. He accepts you so much he is willing to put his future in your hands. Also, you see him in a vulnerable moment that very few people (or maybe just you) have ever seen. This is the moment I love and the reason why I love him releasing in my vagina. Communicate with him and explain your feelings and concerns. Then listen to his.
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