Naughty Selfies – Santa’s Little Helper

Naughty Selfies – Santa’s Little Helper

I’ll try to keep these selfies limited to new outfits, panties, and ideas, rather than the exact same poses and panties every day. Thankfully, I do change my panties! Unfortunately, until I learn how to stretch and morph my body into alien-like positions,  I am a bit limited at what I can do with my camera!

Dear Naughty Selfie Diary: It’s Nippy November!

I originally posted this photo on my naughty twitter account as soon as the Santa themed nighty arrived.  When my husband saw me wearing it,  he yelled, “Stand still, do not move a muscle.”  

If you look close, you can actually see me standing totally still.  See!  I’m not moving! 

Or…maybe you can see my nipples and thigh gap.  It’s whatevz.  

Although technically not a selfie, for us, anything taken with our cell phones is equivalent to a selfie.  This was taken on the fly. You can check our Erotic Photography section for photos that are sexual, but also taken in an artistic way (we hope).   Our original plan was to redo our entire Christmas photo set, but now I am unsure.  We will see what happens with that.  

You can check out all my naughty selfies here!

 

A Total ‘How To’ Woman’s Guide To Licking Your Man’s Ass

A Total ‘How To” Woman’s Guide To Licking Your Man’s Ass

My First Time

I will go over my first experience with eating my man’s ass, which at the time I didn’t even know girls did to guys. I did a photo shoot with my husband back in 2013, labeled “Naughty Girl“, which we tried to articulate the beauty of rimming.   This blog will have other pictures from that photo shoot that we have never previously shared.  This blog will be a total ‘how to’ woman’s guide to licking your man’s ass.

So let’s get naughty… Woman’s Guide To Licking Your Man’s Ass

One night, my husband (boyfriend at the time) and I was talking on the phone.  He was away in college and we were talking about things we wanted to try over Christmas break.  To be honest, long distance and talking over the phone helped us more than anything ever could.  When we were together physically, we tended to shut down our line of communication, and just act and react.  We talked, but it wasn’t necessarily deep. We kiss, say cute things, fuck, then go about our day like everything is perfect.  No real communication. I do believe, that had we not had time apart, it would have took much longer for him to communicate that he had a desire to have his ass licked.  This was over 20 years ago, so it wasn’t a common thing.  In fact, it wasn’t anything I had heard a girl did to her man.   Just totally unexplored territory.  In hindsight, I thought giving a rim job was a joke about gay sex, because I had always heard the term “tossing salad“, but never thought it was a real thing.

Tossing Salad Woman’s Guide To Licking Your Man’s Ass

This actually originated on an HBO documentary called “Prisoners of the War on Drugs” produced in 1996. In the film, there’s a segment called “Tossed Salad man” who describes to a reporter one of the ways another prisoner might pay for drugs or pay off a drug debt. It involves having the person apply some jelly from a jelly packet to his ass hole and then sucking his asshole like it was a pussy, while he jacked off…

We’ve also heard, they can apply salad dressing from a salad packet.  Anything to change the flavor. 

It gets into A LOT more detail than that, as well as a few other “methods of payment” they practiced inside the prison…

The same year, the comedian Chris Rock, having seen the film, worked the term into his stand-up comedy routine. It has been heard in other places since, including movies like Me, Myself and Irene, when Jim Carey is viewing the Chris Rock comedy special on TV…

Here is a clip of the original HBO film:

Okay, so now you know where I had to take my mind to.  A dark place.  I had to prepare myself for prison life.  A live or die mind-set here.  Just a young girl trying to survive…

It didn’t matter.  I was newly in love and nothing would have intimidated me.  I would have agreed to try anything, if he had brought it up.  I was ready to toss his salad, no jelly or salad dressing needed.

During Christmas break, he was staying with me at my house.  My mom would leave for work each day so this is when I would go downstairs and explore all the things a girl will explore when her boyfriend is living with her.  Oral sex, cum shots, having sex 13 times in a day.  You know, the things we do when we are allowed to actually have our boyfriend live with us!

As Christmas break neared an end, he got up the nerve to say to me, in a nervous shaky voice, “Do you want to try to lick me down there?”  

Shocked, I asked, “Do you want another blow job?”   I had no idea.

He didn’t make eye contact and responded, “No, my ass.”

My heart dropped.  Not because it was gross or because I wouldn’t do it.  But because for the first time, I was going to face something sexually that I hadn’t thought about 100 times.  I had thought about giving a blow job for the first time.  I had thought about a guy going down on me for the first time.  I had thought about having a guy on top of me as he pushes his penis inside my body.  I had even stuck things in myself to see what it would feel like.  So when my boyfriend and I were together sexually, nothing intimidated me.  I had already done it in my head so many times, it felt natural.  And I loved the thought of it, so it felt right.  But this?  Licking his asshole?  I had never thought of doing that to anyone.  Not once, in all my teenage years, did I sit in bed late at night and imagine myself putting my face down on a man’s ass, and sticking my tongue out to taste his butt hole.  No way.

This may be hard to relate to, because these days anal play and rim jobs are much more common.  Porn and quick access to any type of fetish, is just a click away.  But back then?  Unheard of.  More woman’s guide to licking your man’s ass below.

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Naughty Selfies – For My Daddy

Naughty Selfies – For My Daddy

Sharing a few selfies I took for my daddy.  I’ll try to keep these selfies limited to new outfits, panties, and ideas, rather than the exact same poses and panties every day. Thankfully, I do change my panties! Unfortunately, until I learn how to stretch and morph my body into alien-like positions,  I am a bit limited at what I can do with my camera!

Dear Naughty Selfie Diary:  Daddy Dearest 

After a long 2 year hiatus, I started actively tweeting again on my naughty twitter account this October.  This was one of the first sets of naughty selfies.  I haven’t done that in ages.  Not that I do not take selfies for my husband, but usually I just take nudes. You know, all out with my balls out.  For the blog and social media, I am going to try and keep it classy, but still naughty in a fun way.  

Why do I call my husband my daddy?  Because he is my daddy.  He is the father of my kids, so naturally I refer to him as dad or daddy, even when talking to my children, because it’s how they know him. This is a point that is never really brought up in articles about women that call their husband’s daddy.  Well, when I ask my daughter to tell her father dinner is done, I say, “Tell daddy his dinner is ready.” I naturally refer to him as daddy around the house even when I am not talking to him.  But that isn’t the only reason.  I never really had a father figure that made me feel like his little princess, or gave me the attention I thought little girls got.  From stories or movies.  My father was abusive.  So what my daddy gives me has nothing to do with my biological father.  At all.  It’s more lack thereof.

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Naughty Selfies – Sweater, Red Panties, and Boots

Naughty Selfies – Sweater, Red Panties, and Boots

I’ll try to keep these selfies limited to new outfits, panties, and ideas, rather than the exact same poses and panties every day.  Thankfully, I do change my panties! Unfortunately, until I learn how to stretch and morph my body into alien-like positions,  I am a bit limited at what I can do with my camera!

Dear Naughty Selfie Diary:  November 19, 2019. 

I took a quick dip into the bathroom at work to take a few selfies for my husband.  It’s getting cold outside so I sent this photo with the caption, “Sweater and boots, I have to keep warm Daddy.”

Stay warm fellas!

Check out all my naughty selfies here!

 

Q&A: I’m Tired of My Husband Watching Porn Before He Has Sex With Me

I’m Tired of My Husband Watching Porn Before He Has Sex With Me

I don’t mind him watching porn in general. Not a big deal. But for the past couple months or so, he will walk into the bedroom fully hard expecting a blowjob, be all revved up because he has been watching porn, and then fuck me. No foreplay to speak of for me really, and if he takes time to do that, then I have to suck him hard again.  That leaves me out of the mood because, well, sucking flaccid dick isn’t super duper hot. Makes me feel kind of pointless and not all that wanted. So lately I’ve just been letting him fuck me and not really bothering with trying to orgasm because there isn’t any guarantee that it is going to last long enough for that. I told him I would like more foreplay and explained this to him and he asked what I want. I said I have no idea, because I’m inexperienced and don’t know what I want in the moment. I just want him. I was told I need to initiate more and ask for foreplay instead of just letting him have sex with me, but as explained, that is also unmotivating. I think I just don’t want to have sex at this point. It’s so much work and very overwhelming.

 

Venice’s response to husband watching porn 

Ryan has done this a few times, but it doesn’t really bother me.  It also never became a habit.  For him it was more of him watching porn late at night while I was in bed.  Rather than finishing by himself, he will come to the bedroom and involve me.  It’s flattering I suppose, because at least I was on his mind.  

Pro:  You are on his mind, because trust me, men can finish by themselves if they are watching porn.  Easy.

Con: Porn is not foreplay and he is disregarding your feelings.  You aren’t a fuck machine and he shouldn’t expect you to get him off just because he is horny from porn.

I understand your issue, although for me, the con doesn’t bother me.  I am totally okay being Ryan’s fuck machine and taking care of him.   If you can find that same submissive girl inside yourself, maybe that is an answer to your problem?

If you think using porn by himself as foreplay is bad, Ryan has also woken me up while pinching the head of his penis, holding a full load of cum in his shaft.  Porn wasn’t even foreplay, it was the whole event!  I just swallowed.  lol   I never really ask what he was doing prior, but I assume he was watching porn and masturbating.  I don’t really care, because I probably just want to go back to sleep.  Rather than waste his cum, he will wake me up and let me know to open my mouth.  Although this sounds awful, I prefer it.  We are intimate enough that he doesn’t need to masturbate, but if he does, I’d like to know it.  Him waking me up is more like him telling on himself. I find it adorable.  He isn’t proud, but he loves seeing me swallow.  I love swallowing him.  This doesn’t happen often, but we have a total open door policy and this is how our relationship works.  No cum gets wasted.

Suggestion:  Watch porn with him.

With all that said, if it bothers you,  tell him it bothers you.  There really isn’t much advice to give other than communicate and let him know that you are not interested in servicing him after he watches porn.  Although what I said was contrary to your experience, that doesn’t make me right.  It’s just what I prefer.  If I was annoyed by Ryan watching porn alone, I’d let him know.  

Ryan’s response to husband watching porn

I think the last comment of your question says it all.  

“I think I just don’t want to have sex at this point. It’s so much work and very overwhelming.”

This is probably why he resorts to porn to get  himself turned on.  He could just finish alone, but he still comes to you for sex.  Maybe you should join him and watch porn with him?  If that also disinterests you, maybe your sex drives just aren’t compatible.  This can be a major issue in a relationship and you may want to read about dead bedrooms and partners with incompatible sex drives.  This pretty much leaves both people totally unsatisfied in a relationship.  One is forced to do something that they find boring, way too much.  The other is forced to deal with no enthusiasm during sex, no initiation, and boring sex.  I’ve learned that the more bored the partner with the low sex drive is, the more they purposely act unenthused.  Consciously or subconsciously they are hoping they can bore their partner into also not wanting sex. Imagine that.

Enthusiasm and attitude is everything.  If you initiate, he probably wouldn’t resort to porn.  However, you will still be dealing with a flaccid penis, because that’s how our penises work. We start all foreplay flaccid, and may even stay flaccid all the way up until penetration.  We have no control over this.  As much as Venice embarrassed me in her response, there was a time when she also had what I consider a very low sex drive.  At least compared to me. I felt bad even asking for sex.  When I did ask, she would purposely give me lifeless oral sex and even sometimes pretend she was falling asleep.  Sex was much the same, but that is how she would get back at me just because I asked for sex.   She wanted me to feel what she felt while having sex.  However, I didn’t feel boredom, I felt unloved and unwanted.  She felt bored and that I wanted her too much. 

Let’s compare these needs?  One feels they are wanted too much.  The other feels unloved and unwanted?

One feels they are used for pleasure.  The other feels unused and can’t give the other pleasure.

I am a bit biased, obviously.  But the issue is real.

I watched porn because it was the only thing that could satisfy my drive. Back then,  I didn’t wake her up, and I didn’t ask her to swallow when I was done.  She hated swallowing!   

We married young and it’s so easy to get caught up in thinking sex is boring and just something adults do.  As we’ve stated since this blog started, our relationship needed a catalyst to realize it’s worth it to have a good attitude, enthusiasm, and be intimate with each other as much as humanly possible.  From a death in our family, to us almost separating, our catalyst was realizing we both didn’t want to give the next person the exact same effort it would require to make that person fall in love, that we could give each other, and fall back in love.   I’ve always said, when you split up, the next relationship will get the best version of you.  So why not just give that best version of you to someone you have history and family with?  That idea changed us.  We started our journey with this new mindset in 2012, when we started this blog. We’ve only gotten closer, more intimate, and have became amazing lovers and best friends.

Back to the topic.  It sounds like your partner may be insensitive.  While at the same time you openly say sex is boring and too much work.  He should work on listening.  You could work on telling yourself that intimacy and sex is a positive bonding experience.  Holding hands, hugging, spending time together talking, can all be too much work if you have negative thoughts about it.  Switch your vibes up and practice being positive.  Nothing will change your life more than good vibes and a positive attitude.

 

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