Category: All Sex

October 2, 2015

What Makes A Penis Attractive To A Woman

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CocklineWhat Makes A Penis Attractive To A Woman

So I decided to write an article dealing with what women find the most attractive about a man’s penis.  In doing so, I have searched for various responses and took a poll that I sent out to other women from all walks of life to get their answers.  Everything quoted throughout this article is the responses from various women about what they find the most attractive about a man’s penis.

First, let’s talk about the survey, published on July 23, 2015, in the Journal of Sexual Medicine, aimed to find out which qualities women consider most carefully when deciding whether a penis is attractive. This survey seems to almost want to prove that women are attracted to more than just size (which goes against previous studies). Researchers from the University of Zurich in Switzerland (I believe these poll results would be drastically different depending on nationality — and even more so if you asked a specific race in a country such as America: Asian, White, Black, Spanish) first asked a group of 105 women, ranging in age from 16 to 45, to look at pictures of male genitalia and rate how “normal looking” they found each penis to be.

Next, the women were asked about which penile qualities they considered most important when assessing the attractiveness of a man’s package. Specifically, subjects were asked to rate the following attributes in order of importance: length of the penis, girth of the penis, position and shape of the meatus (the opening where certain fluids come out), shape of the glans (the rounded tip or head of the penis), appearance of the scrotum, appearance of the skin on the penis, appearance of pubic hair and the overall cosmetic appearance of the penis.

So to break it down, here is how those qualities ranked:

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September 24, 2015

What It Feels Like For A Woman To Have Sex

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woman sexNot all women, but me.

While we have sex, Ryan has said to me several times, “You feel so good, I wish you could feel what I feel.” While it’s definitely a compliment to me, I knew there was no way I could physically/physiologically relate. We can discuss how a sinus headache feels or how good it feels to have someone rub your feet, but male and female orgasms are something I’ve never really been able to compare. Not only am I unable to relate, I really don’t feel there’s anything remotely similar between a penis and vagina to which I can compare the feeling. I understand they both contain nerve endings that, when stimulated, result in an orgasm, but unless we switch bodies, I won’t get it, because I will never, ever, ever, ever, ever have a penis.

Now, because I’m very ticklish, it’s hard to enjoy foreplay in the traditional sense, i.e. being kissed, licked, massaged, etc. I love to be touched, caressed, massaged – all of that – but the tickle sensation always cuts the foreplay short. I’ve gotten better about only because Ryan knows my body. When I lay on my stomach and he massages my back, he know to stay toward the middle of my back, to press hard, or even scratch with increased pressure. When he sits at the edge of the bed and kisses on my neck, he knows to keep his hands on my upper thigh and not on my waist. If he does and he feels my back arch or if I inhale sharply as a reaction to being touched in a sensitive area, he pulls his hand away quickly. But there is a very, very brief moment between his sensual touching and a downright tickle attack where my body is in a heightened state of euphoria. Goose bumps form along my arms and back, the hairs on my body dance, and my nipples get sensitive. I shiver and moan and can feel my eyes moving to the back of my head.

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September 21, 2015

Review: Hipster by Liberator

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First of all, Liberator is a local company just a few miles away from us, so let’s just say we may be a bit biased.  🙂

Okay, not really, being bias is for the weak. Venice and I are strong like bull! However, it is cool to know that the flagship store is near us. Knowing that if this order didn’t turn out right, I could easily storm into the flagship store and flip over tables of anal plugs and penis pumps until I got my satisfaction.  “First of all Ms. Liberator Store Manager Person, either you guys need to add a few inches to this Hipster’s height, or you need to make my penis a few inches bigger.  No exceptions.   I’ll wait over there by the strap ons and ball gags until you decide what you need to do.”  Let’s just hope the Hipster is everything we wanted it to be…

So we got this small package in the mail and had no idea what it would be.  We hadn’t ordered anything small and the box was the size of computer tower.   I opened the box (in the future, if anyone is interested in us recording our box openings, leave a comment and let us know) and saw what appeared to be a cute red velvet material folded nicely, a nice zipped up bag the size of a round couch pillow, and a promotional photo of a woman and her Hipster.  Seeing the red velvet and the promotional photo let me know this was the Hipster. My first thought was, “Oh God, this is blow up furniture.”  A bit disappointed, I pull the material out of the zipped up bag.  It looks like a very durable material. My next thought was, “How long will it take Venice and I to pop this damn thing.”   I saw printed on a small piece of paper, “Vacuum compressed.”  Unsure exactly what that meant, I dug my fingers into the plastic and ripped the material out of the bag.  And then… I was attacked!   As soon as the air hit the inside of the bag, I learned that not only was it not inflatable, it was ready to come out of the package and launch at me.  I panicked, thinking the Hipster would get stuck in the plastic as it expanded, I fought back to rip off all the plastic wrapping so it could expand without any problems.  It did.  In fact, I was blown away by the packaging.  The Hipster is huge, sturdy, and I don’t think there is any way Venice and I could do anything destructive to this thing no matter how rough we got.   I grapple/mma on material similar to what is inside the Hipster, and this stuff is durable as hell.

2015-07-14For me, this is a good thing.  Because recently Venice broke a bouncing sex chair (and my penis) a few months ago and it scarred/scared me for life. We just happen to be filming as it happened.  Yes, that *.gif is the bouncing sex chair breaking mid bounce.  Thankfully my penis made it out of the accident with only a few minor scraps and bruises.

Anyway, I promised myself that if we did more reviews, we would not judge how safe a sex toy is on the environment, how certain rubber will loosen the vagina much more significantly if it’s twice the size of a softer rubber dildo, or how rubbing a sex toy against your body may cause red marks if you do it too hard.  We review for fun, for the experience. I’d like to make sure all our reviews talk about our own personal experience with the product and not something we’ve read or researched.   I also like to have fun, make jokes, and just be myself. No infomercials allowed.  Let’s leave those types of reviews to the sex toys gurus… I just want to fuck Venice while she bends over this sexy ass red velvet pillow.

With that being said, when Venice saw the Hipster on the bed, she ran full speed with her jeans on and belly flopped onto the cushion yelling out, “I’m so tirrrrrred.”  She grunted when she landed. I turned around and laughed when I saw the position she landed in: ass up / face down.  I wanted to rip her jeans off on the spot.

Don’t move, I want a photo!

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September 14, 2015

Random Moments – I Left My Phone At The Bank (Lost Phone)

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phone shockOkay, so I left my phone at the bank. Let me translate.  I lost my homemade porn storage device at a place where there are 5 nosy women just looking for something to do. I think losing my phone may be in my personal top 5 of my biggest fears.  Forget my credit cards, forget my cash, I just do not want to lose my mobile smut machine.

Speaking of my smut machine, it may be time to send this machine to the mechanic (trashcan) for an upgrade.  For weeks now my phone has been messing up.  After I am done using my phone and lay it down, later when I pick it up it is still on (the screen is just black), or the power is totally dead.   I also noticed that there is no lock screen when this happens.  If I turn the phone back on, it will be on exactly what I  was looking at last without a lock screen.

With that being said, I had to run to the bank and get into a safe security box for work.  Before I left, I may have been glancing at twitter.  Don’t ask me why I look at smut on twitter at work in the middle of the day, because usually I don’t.   However, if I publish a blog I will check out twitter to make sure my blog published or see who commented.  Every now and then I will see some random *.gif tweeted that I will click, just to get a closer look.  I call it:  pussy click bait.  I’m a man, I can’t help it.

So I ran into the bank and showed my identification, which is in my phone case.  I got in and out quick and got what I needed. About 2 hours later I got a call at my office from a clerk at the bank.  When I picked up the line she said, “Hello Ryan, did you forget something?”

I responded, “What, my keys?”  I had no idea why I said that because I couldn’t have drove back to work without my keys.   I just really had no idea why she was calling.

She laughed and said, “Are you missing your wallet?”

Fuck, my wallet.  Otherwise known as my fucking phone. Otherwise known as if you click the gallery icon you end up seeing about 50 cock pics of myself, in various random positions that Venice requests during the day, face showing, smiling, and looking like a total toolbag.  You’d also see about 500 various shots of Venice and her vagina, face, titties, ass, whatever.  That “wallet” is my porn stash.

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September 7, 2015

Body Issues and That Weight Loss Blog!

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Weight-Loss-PlateauI originally titled this blog “Congratulations Venice!” I changed it because I ended up about 7 or 8 paragraphs deep and decided to give it an actual title.  My original purpose was to give a quick summary on her weight loss and tell her congratulations for losing over 40 pounds in 8 months!  If you see her on twitter @Venicebloggs, maybe give her a quick tweet congratulating her.  She’s earned it.

About 8 months ago Venice decided that she wanted to be back at her marriage weight, which is around 135.  She chose a target date, our anniversary, and it began.  Since she would probably never talk about herself or her weight loss journey, I figured why not do it for her.

The journey started extremely slow.  At first there were arguments over whether a cup of coffee with creamer was something she should cut from her diet (she eventually switched to a non fat creamer, but not without a fight).  She cut out pepsi, started drinking just water, and cut her meal size down to one serving. Although the idea of “one serving” may be weird, it’s those half servings or desserts that really start adding on the calories you can’t cut by the end of the day.  It’s also a lifestyle change. Once your plate is done, the meal is over.

However, very little weight was lost. The lifestyle changes were subtle and still not enough to make an impact on the scale. Without hard work and exercise this was just going to be another failed diet.   This is the biggest step of all I think.  Saying to yourself that a pill, an electronic shocking belt, a gimmick, a juice diet, or some weird idea to lose weight just isn’t going to work.  The key is to tell yourself, “I have to change my life and actually exercise.”

This was hardest step because Venice once had a successful “run” with some not-so-legal pills shipped in from Mexico when she was 19 years old.  She claims the most she ever lost was because of these pills (she lost about 10 pounds — which is laughable now).  So since she was 19, she used her Mexican Fat Burner pills as a crutch and has always been very big on the idea of “can I try this pill though?”

NO PILL FOR YOU!  *Diet Pill Nazi*

2015-07-22Venice never needed a damn pill. What’s funny is, at 19 she had the skinniest arms and shoulders I had ever seen on a girl.  I could see the anatomy of her clavicle and shoulder bone.  By far the slimmest girl I ever dated. Those pills may have helped her lose 10 pounds quickly, although probably all water weight, but she didn’t need it.  She’s a tough girl. Anything she puts her mind to, she can do. Venice was in the military, so this wasn’t the first time she made this lifestyle decision.  She was in great shape while in the military.  I saw her go from not being able do a push-up, to doing 20.    From not being able to run a mile, to running 3 (and lost 20 pounds on accident, no pills needed).   This was a long way long way from her teenage days of having the skinniest arms I had ever seen and still being extremely unathletic. In my opinion (she’d disagree), she was naturally slim but had horrible eating habits (her mother gave her money for Carl’s Jr. each night instead of making home made meals) and probably hadn’t exercised a day in her life.  Her arms were sticks, her waist horded all her fattening food, and she felt “fat” just because she didn’t look like a swimsuit model.  She used to say to me, “Just because I am 129 doesn’t mean I am not fat.”  I was just a young guy.  Guys already don’t get it.  But at that age, I really didn’t get it. I cared very little about any of her body issues.  All I cared about was her vagina (which unfortunately I didn’t have one of my own, or before her, one to play with).  I just really really wanted it. Seriously.   Eat Carl’s Jr. all you want, just please eat that greasy ass burger while you squat over my face so I can study your pussy up close.  Thanks.

Continue Reading Body Issues and That Weight Loss Blog!